We are all searching for that thing. The one that will finally make us happy.  We know if we could just get it, it would fill our hearts and souls with a sense of contentment and joy.  

So often we think it is about our relationships, our work, or meeting our next achievement.   

Being competitive and wanting more is embedded deeply in our value system even though we don’t always acknowledge it or recognize the symptoms.  Although I have been acutely aware of it for some time, I continue to see it popping up in my coaching practice. I’ll tell myself it is about service and not the money or keeping up with others in my field, but I’ll be the first to admit that too often I find myself feeling I should be more successful. 

The more I become aware of this, the more I realize that the constant focus on financial rewards leaves me feeling shallow and empty. So I’m actively working to shift my focus away from activities that are about improving my status and turning them toward serving others.  I am directing my attention to making the greatest impact I can with the message I feel the Holy Spirit calls me to share.  

But when I look around at all the others out there who do what I do and the mind-blowing numbers of people they reach on a weekly basis, I have to admit that it makes me feel very inadequate by comparison.  I know that it isn’t about the numbers and I also know that if even one person feels closer to God when they hear my message, that my time is well spent.  

But sometimes I wonder if I’m really doing what God really wants me to do and I wonder if it’s enough.  And then I listened to a meditation today that really blew me away.  In it, the woman leading the meditation said, “What if God’s presence is enough?”

What comes up for you when you hear those words?  For me, it was such a peaceful feeling.  One of knowing that it IS enough. 

I mean, who am I kidding? I have a lovely home, a beautiful family, lots of friends, even work that helps me feel fulfilled.  But if every one of those things was stripped away, I’d still have everything I need. 

So why do I strive so hard? 

Because, somewhere along the way, I bought off on the story that I needed to perform a certain way to be acceptable.  In the early years it was based on how many books I read, how many S’s and later A’s I got on why report cards, then it was how much money I earned per hour which somewhere progressed to what my title was and then how many people I supervised.  

When I entered the world of coaching, I realized that none of those measurements mattered anymore. And once I realized the freedom that comes with accepting who I am and that I get to choose what success looks like, it was very liberating. I learned that less really is more and that the simpler our lives are the more rewarding they are.

Unfortunately, knowing that isn’t enough. I’m human and I slip back into the comparison game on occasion.  But when I do, I am able to take a deep breath and refocus on the things that truly matter.  More often than not, I need the help of my coach to reframe an issue when I get stuck, and I’m so grateful to have that opportunity. 

In my previous life, I was driven by so many things that I created in my mind that had nothing to do with performing at my work. I was trying so hard to do all the things I felt I needed to do that I was slowly killing myself with stress and the ways it manifested in my body. 

And I had no idea that there were people out there that could help me change the way I look at the world and what I believed about myself.  As I wandered through life doing all these crazy things that I thought would make my life richer, I was really only adding to the stress and overwhelm.  If only I had known then what I know now, I could have been so much more effective at my work. 

But I didn’t know it then. And I believe that God placed that longing to enter into this phase of my life because there are so many people in the professional work world that are just like I was, trying to be a superhero and be everyone’s go-to girl at work and at home.  There is this misconception many of us have that by juggling the kids, the meetings, the church groups, all the while making sure we make time for extended family and friends once in a while, we are going to get some big reward. Sadly the reward is usually couched in buying new larger clothes and a dream of taking a vacation someday, but never actually taking the time to plan it, much less take that vacation.  

But what if you could just stop the craziness? And instead of trying to be all things to all people, you could focus on the things that really matter and let go of the rest?  If you could reconnect with the things you love and find that place of contentment? 

The world tells us that to be content requires us to fill everything on our bucket list, reach our personal and financial goals, and to keep working toward the prize at the end of the game whether it be retirement, that long sought after vacation or even the dream house on the beach.  Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing inherently wrong with any of those things, in fact, I am hoping to accomplish a few of those things myself.  

But I’ve learned through personal experience and from observing others who have met their goals in this life, that if those are the things we are counting on to help us feel content, we will be disappointed in the end. 

You’ve probably heard the saying that comparison is the thief of joy, and it’s true, because every time we reach one of those goals, we see someone else who has done it better, faster, or with greater success.  And it causes us to be discontent and want more. So we keep our heads down and try harder.  Oh, we know we are supposed to be content with what we have, but until we refocus our definition of success, we will find the things we have won’t satisfy. 

I think Paul hits the nail on the head in Philippians 4:11, where he says, “…for I have learned how to get along happily whether I have much or little.” He goes on to say, “I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything with the help of Christ who gives me the strength I need.”

I have found that I really need to look hard at my motivation for wanting something. If it is just for me and my comfort, I probably am not going to find any real satisfaction in it if I get what I want.  But, if I am grateful for all I have and get the urge to do something that will further God’s purposes, then when I complete that task, I feel fulfilled and content.  

Knowing that, when I talk about longing for more, I’m referring to that whisper in our ear that God wants us to take action on something he’s been calling us to do.  We can talk about doing it, we can dream about doing it, but until we actually do it, we won’t get the satisfaction nor will God tell us our next step.  

So contrary to what all the best marketing guru’s in the world will tell you, filling your life with the things they are selling is not going to bring you joy and happiness.  Only following God’s will can bring joy and contentment into our lives.  

You see, it’s all about you and your path.  Not the guy in the next cubicle at work, not the gal in the cute little outfit at Yoga, or even the seemingly perfectly put together woman across the aisle at church.  None of their lives have any bearing on the call that God has placed on your life and none of them get to vote about how you fulfill your calling.  Sure, one or more of them may be placed in your life to give you encouragement and support, but they are not there to make you feel inadequate, unworthy, or incomplete in any way.  

So stop looking outside yourself to see what you need to bring fulfillment and peace into your life.  Look deep inside yourself and see what you are longing for and determine if it is from God or a trick to keep you from enjoying God’s presence.  Only when you let yourself get quiet enough to listen to him will you truly know that you are enough and his presence is all you really need. 

If you resonated with this message, I hope you will give yourself permission to look hard at the things you are striving to accomplish right now.  Will they bring you to a place of contentment? Or are they going to add more stress and overwhelm into your day? If you aren’t sure, pray about it.  Read a devotional or scripture and see what God wants you to know about it.  

If you need some help sorting through it all, I would love to help you with that. Connect with me on my Facebook page to schedule an appointment with me or go directly to my calendar to book a call.  During our time together, you will create a sense of clarity about what is missing in your life, discover the essential building blocks for having the life of your dreams, determine the #1 thing stopping you from having the life you want, identify the most powerful actions that will move you toward the “More” you desire, and complete the consultation with the excitement of knowing EXACTLY what to do next to create the life your soul is longing for!  Sounds pretty exciting, doesn’t it?  Believe me, it is!

Thank you for stopping by today.  Your presence really does bring me joy.  If you know of someone who could benefit from this message please share it with them. 

Now I encourage you to go, find that place of contentment in your life and live your more!